Breakdown of a system (2015)- full story

The story is not suitable for under the age of 16, potentially disturbing and shocking scenes, autodestructive scenes, the use of opiates, indications of explicit scenes, mild profanity. Do not try anything from the above.
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September 15th, 2015. Tuesday evening.

CHAPTER 1

 The silver car parked in front of the Philward family's house. It was the car of the head of a the family, Mr. Harold Philward. A seemingly harmonious family with no complications and problems consisted of four members: Mr. Harold, his wife Lucy and their two daughters, sixteen-year-old Teyna and fourteen-year-old Becky. Harold is the owner of a smaller company and mostly comes home at dinner time. Lucy works in the daily newspaper editorial office until the afternoon, after which she comes home. Becky is an excellent student at the end of elementary school, she is very withdrawn and doesn't come out with friends. Her hair is connected in two braids and her clothes are simple and unobtrusive. Unlike her, Teyna is a girl who comes out every night, wearing remarkable clothes and a strong makeup. Earlier she had brown hair like Becky, but now she dyes it in different colors to point out her wild side. Her parents never met her friends and didn't know where she was going. She would usually ran off from home and go to a party.

 "Is there anyone here?" Harold asked in the house, and Lucy from the kitchen answered: "I am here in the kitchen!" Harold (entering the kitchen): "Where are the girls?" Lucy: "Becky is in her room, Teyna has not come yet." Harold: "So where is she till now ?! She's acting very irresponsibly. You have to be tougher with her." Lucy: "Me? You're the head of the family, it's up to you to solve such a things ." Harold: "She doesn't listen to me anymore." Lucy: "She doesn't listen to me neither!" Harold: "Good ... it will pass . There is certainly a boyfriend and she spends time with him. I'm not a supportive of that, but it's better than going with who knows what kind of a company and doing nonsenses." Lucy: "You're right ... I'm going to call Becky to have dinner.

 Becky's room. Becky reads the book on her bed. The interior of her room, painted in gentle pink, has shelves with books, a work desk, a bed and a cabinet. Everything is neatly arranged, the shelves are decorated with simple decorations, making her room a serious and lovely at the same time. The knocking on the door meant that she should come down to dinner, which was getting harder for her lately. She wanted to be skinny like her sister, with Teyna not being  much skinnier than her, but for her that difference seemed tremendous. Kids in school also teased her for her weight ...

 The dinner started. The sound of a cutlery interrupted Teyna with her appearance, shocking her parents. Lucy: "What's that on your eyebrow ?!" Teyna: "Piercing, what, like you never saw a piercings?" Lucy: "Oh, yes, I did, but I didn't even dream that I would see it on you!" Teyna: "What do you want, it looks awesome on me! My company totally adores this little but effective change." Harold: "What kind is your company? Why don't you bring them here ?!" Teyna: "Near you two crazy people? No way! I'm sorry that poor Becky can't escape from you as I can. You pretend to be a harmonious family, hell yeah harmonious. (going to the room)" Harold:" Now I will show her who's the boss! "Lucy (calms him):" Let her go, these are teenage hormones. "

 Teyna's room; Teyna is sitting on the floor with a phone in her hands. There are plenty of clothes and other scattered things on the floor. The furniture is in bright colors, just like the walls that are green and yellow. Teyna called one of her friends: "Tonight will be great! Don't forget our candies, without them it won't be the same! (a few seconds of break). Sure, bring him too. Okay, see you there! "

 In the evening, Teyna meet her friends in front of the club. Joseph also joined them and brought "candy", ie, ecstasy, which they shared and went to the club. In the meantime, the effect of drug started and Teyna got closer to Joseph. She danced alongside him, and he kissed her on the neck. Later they started with a more serious kissing, not paying attention to the people around them, and then together went to Joseph's apartment and slept there.

 Morning: Harold is in the company and talks to the secretary who is in his office, Lucy is busy with work and has a third coffee to keep herself awake, Becky gives her lunch to a abandoned dog she met on the way to school, while between the classes locks herself in the woman's toilet.

 Teyna wakes up next to Joseph, dressed only in the top and underwear. Teyna: "What the hell happened? Did we ..." Joseph (catching her around her waist): "We did ... uh, how hot you are! I didn't even notice this yesterday, but now I'm glad you're here ... (started kissing her)" Teyna: (getting away):" No, it's not a problem that we were together ... the problem is...What if I get pregnant? What should I do? I'm only sixteen, my parents would kill me!" Joseph:" You won't, baby! Everything will be great ... (gives her ecstasy) Come on , take it, don't be embarrassed! " After a few moments of thinking Teyna took a pill ...

 In the evening, the whole family assembles at the table for dinner. Lucy (to Teyna): "Where were you this morning?" Teyna: "At a friend's house, she broke up with a boyfriend so I comforted her all night and slept there." Harold: "What's your friend's name?" Teyna: "Jo... Joanna, we've been hanging out for a while." Harold (to Becky): "I've seen your future professor today, she can hardly wait you to join their school,  considering how responsible and intelligent you are." Becky: "But ... I have not yet said in which high school I want to go! " Harold: "There is no dilemma, my dear, I will not allow you to be a gang like your sister and to comfort some friends in the middle of the night!"

 She wanted to be a librarian, where she would be with her friends books, not to became a doctor like her mother who never found a job in the profession and then she was forced to work in the editorial office. She got out of the table and went to bathroom while the others didn't get up, there she threw up the food she ate before the others heard vomiting from the bathroom ... She was exhausted and went to her room. She was alone in this world, and not even in the family it was all right. Kids from school teased her, no one notices that she cries after every class,she concentrate on the school just to ease the scream in her head ... And all this with weight loss ... at the depths of the soul she knew it was not because of her sister, but because of her. Parents passed perfectionism to her and now they are forcing their attitudes on her. She knew that she didn't have much time to turn her own boat on her way, specially because one month remained till enrollment to new school.

 Teyna sneaked out of the window again and went to the park. This time, one of the friends brought a new drug, for which she said it's a cocaine. The whole company took a little bit and went to a nearby club where Teyna danced with a young man until late hours. This time there were only kisses and touches, but nothing more serious. She returned early in the morning and felt asleep. For less than two hours the alarm rung and she looked more like a zombie than a nice young girl. She put a makeup on, hid a scars from a needle with a bracelets and came out of the room.

 In the hall she met Becky, dressed in a jacket, although it's already summer time. Teyna: "Why are you wearing a jacket in this heat?" Becky: "Well... I like to wear it." Tejna: "Strange ... last year you didn't wear a jacket on summer... (suspicious and scared at the same time) Are you doing drugs?!" Becky (marveling): "No! No way! No!... I do not know how this idea came to your mind ... "

 In the Harold's office, the secretary massaged Harold's neck. Secretary: "Oh, boss, you are so tense ... Do you want a massage of some other body parts?" Harold (quietly): "Oh yes ... Just lock the door for any case ... It is true that the shift ends in four and everyone went home, but security is security ... "

 Lucy, tired of work, arrived home at noon and started to prepare lunch. Since milk had disappeared, she decided to go to shop about five o'clock. There she had an unpleasant surprise: Harold's employee was in the same market, she asked what is he doing here when the shift lasted up to seven and she received an unexpected response- the shift ends in four for everybody, with Harold still able to leave earlier because his job is to oversee the work. Lucy wondered: what then her husband does three hours longer in the company?

 In the evening, Lucy wore the red lingerie and laid beside Harold. Harold: "What is this, honey? Where you got that?" Lucy: "I bought it last year ... there was no chance to wear it." Harold: "Honey, but I can't now, I'm tired ..." Lucy: "It's been a year, honey. Am I not beautiful to you anymore? Is that it?" Harold (kisses her in the forehead and turns): "No, good night." Lucy: "Good night."

 Over the next week, Becky had exams, which she passed with a large number of points. There was again raised the question of her further education- while she wanted to go to a school where she would become a librarian, her father and mother wanted a medical school. She cried all the time when she was alone, along with the destruction of her body with bulimia, barely concealing how horribly she feels.

 On the other hand, her sister took her dose of euphoria every night and ended up in the embrace of another guy, who would in turn give her a drug pack. It was easier than thinking about reality, because she had already become addicted ...

 One day, Teyna needed a book from Becky's room but, as Becky wasn't there, she just walked in and took it. However, she noticed something strange on a little table, something that shouldn't be found in a lady's room. Small, rectangular, shining, sharp.A razor blade. She wondered why her sister would need it ... And then she realized! The jacket ... hides her sister's scars! Oh, this is terrible! She wanted to tell her parents, but ... she remembered that she's in the problem too. A big problem. She can't tell about Becky because she has secret too.

 She waited for Becky in the evening to finish her meal and went after her. She stopped her before Becky reached the bathroom and then said, "Today I had to take a book from your room." Becky: "Okay, no problem." Teyna: "I think there's a problem. What is this doing in your room?" (takes a razor blade from the pocket)" Becky (trying not to act strange):" That? That was in my room? ... No way! " Teyna: "Give me your arm!" Becky: "No! Go to hell, I told you it was not mine!" Teyna (with force took Becky's arm, pulled her sleeve up and saw scars): "You ... Why? Why, Becky?" Becky (moving her arm and heading toward Teyna's room): "Now I'll see what you're hiding! I know you're hiding something, I know it! " Teyna: "No, don't!"

 Becky entered the room and didn't need much time to see the syringe and the white powder package on the bed. The sisters made a pact to keep silent about the problem of the other and not interfere until they give permission for it.
 

 
CHAPTER 2

 Over the next week, Lucy left Becky alone and went to Harold's company. The hall was empty so she immediately headed for Harold's office. She climbed up the stairs and reached the door, from where she heard strange sounds that came from the office. When she walked through the door which wasn't locked this time, Lucy remained shocked. Her husband, her devoted husband and the one she counted on, was caught cheating on her with a ten year younger secretary!

 She felt a contraction in her left arm and an unpleasant feeling in the heart area, then started crying. Harold tried to justify himself and the secretary came out of the office. Seeing that Lucy completely turned pale, Harold called for ambulance to come in. The help quickly arrived and took Lucy to the hospital, where she received the news that she just had a heart attack.

 Harold waited for Lucy to get better, entered her hospital room and began the conversation: "The girls don't have to know what happened in the company. We will not tire them with our problems." Lucy: "Our problems?!" Do you think this is a small problem that can be solved just like that? You are an enormous fool, the bottom of life! How could you do this to me, jerk? How many days have you been doing this? How long have you been cheating on me with that stupid girl? " Harold (after a break): "Half year." Lucy got shocked and then wept again. The doctor went in and said she could continue with everyday activities, with a mild lifestyle change, as this problem with a heart attack wouldn't be repeated , and gave her a permission to go home. Harold offered to drive her home, but she refused and walked back, just not to be close to him as much as possible. Since then, they were sleeping in separate rooms.

 During that time, Teyna noticed that she gained a little of weight, her period was late ... she hoped she wasn't pregnant, oh, it's the last thing she needs right now! She was even more sick in the morning. After dinner, she felt nausea (which was strange to her, as it usually happened in the morning) and she went to the bathroom. Becky was already inside and deliberately throwing up the food she had eaten during the dinner. Another secret that Becky was hiding.

 Teyna asked herself- how is it possible she didn't figure out what her sister did when she rose from dinner? At that moment Becky went out of the bathroom and nervously asked Teyna: "Well ... you were there? I ... um ... I washed my hands ...and that took a while... you turned pale. Are you all right?" Teyna: "Frankly, no, I am not well, and I heard you aren't neither. Do you always do this after a meal? " Becky: "There are many things that you don't know about me, it's not that someone was interested in it. Why would somebody care if Becky has her dreams, does she self-harm or have a bulimia? Who's giving a damn about Becky! Becky's here to be ruined when they weren't able to direct Teyna to the right way! But, I will not be able to endure this long enough. Teyna ... get back to normal while you still can. I saw you while you sneak out the window. I don't know where you are going, but take care of yourself. " Teyna never saw her sister so serious and she was concerned. She was afraid what she meant when said that she won't be able to endure all this long enough ...

 Daybreak. Lucy has the first coffee and smokes a fifth cigarette. Harold enters the kitchen and warns: "If you continue this way, you will again have a heart attack! Irresponsible!" Lucy (angrily looks at him): "Look who tells me. Why don't you save your advices for your secretary, when she is so close to your heart? " Harold: "I didn't blame you when you left my best friend and start a relationship with me!" Lucy: "It's not the same! You're now the father of two daughters, I was young and I could do what I liked ! " Harold: "Yes, sure, what about that he died because he got drunk after breaking up? Somehow, you killed him." Lucy (rising): "You're as much guilty as I am! I haven't forced you to be with me! " Harold: "You seduced me, not the opposite!" Lucy: "I don't know what the hell I've seen in you ... I thought you were better. My mistake." Lucy left the room, and a little later entered Teyna, without any makeup on her face, revealing the how pale she is. Harold: "What do you look like? Did you sleep at all?" Teyna: "Yes, I don't like getting up early, so I look like zombie. Oh, seven o'clock, I'm getting away from here! " Harold: "Like that?" Teyna: "Okay, I'll make myself look like human, whatever, don't bother me anymore!" Harold looked out of the window while Teyna was leaving, not believing that he allowed his daughter to behave like this ...

 In the evening, at the dinner, Harold asked Teyna about her success at school, which she wasn't quite ready for. Harold: "Well, young lady, you're always avoiding mentioning your success at school, but you can no longer hide because school year is at its end. Even if you don't say, we'll find out sooner or later, and it's better to end it now." Teyna:" Well, you know how, I'm not exactly, you know, the worst, and I'm definitely not a nerd. I've fixed the worst mark in chemistry class and now I'm just fine. " Lucy: "What does it mean to you, just fine?" Very good*?" Teyna:" God, no! Haha, look at her, very good. I've come... Enough*. I am satisfied. " Harold: "What?!! Satisfied!! Are you crazy ?!" Teyna: "Uuuh, I'm sorry, I'm a modest person!" Lucy: "What are you doing with your life? Be more like your sister! "Teyna:" You mean the person who, because of you, suffers from bulimia? You don't see what's happening to your children at all!" Harold: "Becky suffers from bulimia ?!" Becky (panicking): "What have you done now? It should have been a secret! How would be if I tell your secret?" Teyna: "It wasn't on purpose, sorry!" Lucy: "What secret? And you, Becky, why did you keep silent? We'll arrange for recovery ..." Becky: "I don't want a damn recovery, I want you to shut up." Harold: "What kind of vocabulary is that, Becky? Besides, what kind of secret does your sister have?" Teyna: "If you say, I'll have to say your other secret." Lucy: "You have two secrets?" Becky: "Tell them, I don't care, I'm sick of you all!" (rises and leaves) "Harold:" Teyna, tell me. " Teyna: "I won't. You are not telling us anything, so why the hell should we tell it to you." She arose and went to her room, leaving her parents to argue.

 The school year is over. Teyna is rarely at home, Becky is struggling to enroll the desired school, but in vain, Harold continues to see the secretary and Lucy even more ruins herself with cigarettes and coffee, while doing a stressful job. To calm down and find out she was not pregnant, Teyna bought the pregnancy test. While she was waiting for the results, she prayed that everything will be all right ... The test was positive. The cold sweat covered her. She knew this was the worst case scenario that could have happened. She decided to go to Joseph and talk to him.

 Joseph waited there, pale and visibly ill. Teyna: "What happened to you?" Joseph: "We have to talk. It's serious." Teyna: "That's what I wanted to say ..." They went in and sat down on the couch. Joseph: "Do you want me to say first or you? I think it's the smarter thing that you say first." Teyna: "I'm pregnant." Joseph (shocked): "Oh, no, damn it, how did that happen? We were probably half-conscious during the impact of drugs ... Dammit, you're still underage ... I was hoping that there was a likelihood that everything was fine, but given that there was no protection, I think I have more worse news. " Teyna: "Worse than this?! It can't be worse than this!" Joseph: "It can." Teyna: "Oh, my God, how terrible?" Joseph: "I noticed something was wrong with me for some time ... I didn't react until the beginning of the month. I was on the medical exam. I'm HIV positive. I will not live long." Teyna almost didn't faint and, when she put herself together, asked quietly, "You mean ... that I may be infected too?" Joseph: "Yes. I'm sorry ... I'm sorry ... (he looked to the ground and she puts her hand on his shoulder) What have you decided about the child? " Teyna: "I don't know. I'll go first to an exam and then I'll see what I'm going to do." Joseph: "I'll be with you whatever you decide."

 The next day Teyna went to the exam. The results were due to arrive the next day and that was the worst day in her life until then. She got up in the morning and went to the hospital, where she was waiting for the results. Both scenarios happened; she is both pregnant and HIV positive. She didn't know how to tell her parents about this, it would be a catastrophe. She went to a club alone, ordered a few drinks and lit a joint to briefly lose her thoughts in smoke ...

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*-in our school system kid's success in school is marked with not enough (when someone is failing the year), enough, good, very good and excellent (the most successful one).
 
CHAPTER 3

 That Wednesday Becky and Teyna were alone in the house. Becky looked up in front of her as she sat on the stairs, Teyna came and sat beside her. Teyna: "Hey, what's up?" Becky: "I'm worried. I lost control of my life. Mother is forcing me to go for treatment but I don't want to go, maybe they'll find out and that I'm self-harming. What's troubling you? " Teyna: "Do you promise that you won't tell anyone?" Becky: "I swear. Come on, rant on." Teyna: "I'm pregnant." Becky: "When did this happen?!" Teyna: "Last month. Even worse, the guy I was with brought me HIV." Becky: "Oh God, that means you will not live long! Damn it... it's worse than I thought! It's better not to give birth to that child. " Teyna: "I know ... I can't believe that you and I have been stuck in this way, I just hope you get out of this." Becky: "No, Teyna. It's not just about eating disorder and entering the school I want. My whole life I'm trying to be as good as I can, but it seems to me that people don't care for me as a person, but for my success. When someone would ask our parents to describe me, they would start with a 'good student'. No one wants to know real me. As time passes by, the more I feel like a prisoner. I'm sorry that you are suffering from an incurable disease, it would be better if I got infected and to you live for a long time, to have a family ..." Teyna : "What are you talking about? Honey, life is in front of you! Don't think about death. You see,even I don't think about it! Everything is fine, everything is fine ... "

 Thursday, the day like every other. Teyna is with her friends, trying out a new kind of drug, not thinking about pregnancy or illness. Lucy went from a job earlier to join Becky at the time of enrollment, which didn't suit her. She watched calmly while her mother had wrote a medical school as the first choice, but stopped her when she wanted to hand over the paper. Becky: "I hate medicine. You had to understand that by now." Lucy: "I don't care what you hate , I care what's best for you. " Becky: "If you give that damn paper, I swear to you that I will never go to that school or even to the damn recovery!" Lucy: "Do not threaten me! You can't do anything against me! I won't let you be like your sister. " Lucy handed over the paper and then Becky's face filled with hate ...

 In the evening, Becky was lying on the bed and staring at the ceiling. She was burning with the desire to shout out loud everything to her parents for all these years of their poor caring for her. She was never allowed to go out after school, to have friends, to be in a relationship. She existed only for showing, like a wunderkid without a soul, but with brilliant behavior and excellent grades. All their care would be reduced to the sentence "Be like Becky" without thinking what this Becky hides inside. They wouldn't even know about bulimia if Teyna didn't accidentally say. She knew that the recovery is only worrying that the wunderkid doesn't ruin completely, not care about her. She knew ... There is no returning back.

 Friday morning. The phone rings and Harold answers and, after completing the conversation, he enters the kitchen where the rest of Philward's finished their breakfast. Harold: "Well, finally good news! Becky, you're accepted to school!" Becky (indifferent): "The one you wanted? " Harold: "Yes, that's best for you." Becky: "And what's good about it?" Lucy: "You will see that you will like medicine!" Becky: "And what if I won't? Would you perhaps force me to love it?!" Harold: "You're too rude!" Becky: "Oh, you consider this to be rude? Well, you know what? I'm sick of you two. I'm sick of everything. You chose every goddamn class I've been and in every single one I had problems! It's because you wanted to make something supernatural of me and you just brought me to this! I hate you both. " Lucy: "How can you talk like that to us?!" Becky: "Shut up, I'm taking now, you talked enough! It's time for me to say something! I'm tired of being silent... if Teyna wasn't here I would give up everything earlier ... she is the only one in this house who understands me at least a bit. You two can GO TO HELL!!! "

Becky got up and went to the bathroom again, and Harold and Lucy, who were in disbelief, realized that they are late to work and hurried off without looking where Becky gone, only Lucy said, "We'll continue this conversation later."

 Teyna tried to get into the bathroom, but the door was locked. "Becky, are you in there? Is everything all right?" Becky: "Yes, everything is perfect. I need a nice, relaxing bath to calm down. A long, a long bath. Nothing calms a person like a long bath." Teyna: "Okay, but call me if there's a problem. I'll be out for an hour or two, please don't make any nonsense." Becky: "There will be no nonsense. Take care of yourself." Teyna moved away from the door and went out. Becky whispered: "There will be no nonsense ... This time I will be serious ..."

 Teyna met with Joseph. Joseph: "Hey, what's up?" Teyna: "Oh, some problems in the house ... But my sister finally got brave." Joseph: "You want one pill?" Teyna: "Not now, maybe tonight. How are you feeling today?" Joseph: "Okay. You? How is the mother of my future child?" Teyna (surprised): "Wait, what?" Joseph: "Come on, don't get this on wrong way, I'll never have children anyway." Teyna (smiled gently): "How can I know that it is yours? What if I happened to be with another guy after that? I mean, I think it's yours, I'm just not sure..." Joseph (kiss her cheek): "It's mine. I'm an adult and I can support you while I'm alive. I love you, Teyna." Teyna: "I think I love you too, Joseph." They kissed as if it was their first kiss in their whole life.

 Teyna returned home, smiling for the first time this month (not counting the time spent under the influence of a drug) and called Becky to share joyful news with her. She didn't respond. She shouted: "Becky, Becky, where are you? Are you there? "She came to the door of the bathroom and knocked." Becky, Becky, are you there? Becky, if you are there, open to me, you scare me! Becky! " She was not in the room, nor in the kitchen, the doors were locked as when she got out, she was not even in the living room ...

 She called Lucy and cried out in a panic: "Listen, something terrible is happening here! Becky went in the bathroom two hours ago for a "long relaxing bath", actually three hours ago ... no matter how much, and still hasn't gone out! I am worrying for her, please come home, I can't break the door by myself !!! " Lucy: "Calm down, I'll call Harold and we'll come... nothing will happen to her. It's true that she is exhausting herself with everyday's vomiting, but the worst thing that can happen is to faint ... but she'll return to normal if that happens ..." Teyna:" Leave your stupid ideas, Becky is self-harming! " Lucy (shocked): "WHAT ??? With what?" Teyna: "With razor blades! Oh God, oh God ..." Lucy (panic): "I'll call Harold right away and we'll come home!"

 Teyna tried to unlock the door, but it was locked in from the inside, tried to open it again, without success. She was tired, but decided to try one more time. Lucy and Harold got out of the car when Teyna hit the door with all the power she had. At the entrance to the house, they heard the most horrifying scream in their lives -Teyna saw a scene that froze blood in her veins. They ran toward her and lost themselves in front of the scene- Becky laid in a tub full of blood, pale and with slitted wrists. Teyna kneeled beside the door, cried and held in her hands the last words that Becky wrote on paper and intended for her: "I'm sorry Teyna, forgive me. Take care of yourself." Lucy whispered softly: "Is she ... dead? Maybe... " She shout to her:" Yes, she's dead! You killed her! I hate you!" Harold:" Calm down, we know this is great stress for you ..." Teyna went out of the bathroom and ran to Becky's room. Harold called ambulance, Lucy cried like a rain, mostly due to feelings of guilt. She was hopelessly searching for a pulse on her body, but Becky only laid motionless in her waterbed, with her hair let down and in a white dress that took on the color of the blood. On the floor there was a bloody razor by which Becky took her life. The doctors constanted death.

 Lucy and Harold forgot about their disagreements at that moment, and Teyna spent all afternoon locked in her sister's room crying. Joseph called her on the phone. Joseph: "Hey, what happened? You sound like you cried." Teyna: "My sister ... she killed herself." Joseph: "Oh, God! What happened?" Teyna: "I left her alone in the bathroom ... Oh, damn it, I knew she was depressed ... and then she slit her wrist ... I found her dead in a bathtub ... "Joseph:" It sounds awful! You can come to me if you need a shoulder to cry on, I'm here. "Teyna:" I'm coming. Here is insane and now I need peace . " Joseph: "All right, I'm waiting for you." Teyna came out of the room, and in the passage Harold asked where she was going, to which she replied: "To Joseph, my future husband." Harold was shocked by her response, but he didn't want to be bothered by her problems.

 The funeral was scheduled in two days, and the commemoration was the next day. Some of the people from Becky's school had speeches, but none of them seemed as if they knew her. At one point, Teyna got up and began to say her speech: "Nobody knew Becky as me and nobody knew me like she did. We knew the most important secrets of each other, but yesterday everyone found out her secret. My sister loved books and she wanted to be a librarian. Still, our beloved parents wanted her to be a doctor, which would be ironic because she was sick because of these same parents. She told me that some boys called her fat, and I told her to tell them to go to hell because one day she would be a pretty girl who will attract these same boys. She didn't listen to me. She once told me she would like me to be more like me. I have never understood what she saw in me as her hero, because, let's be honest, I'm not a role model at all. Why would anyone have a drug addict as a role model? (after this sentence, Harold and Lucy look each other in disbelief) I loved her. She was a good listener, ready to listen to everything. I would sometimes think she was an older sister, not me. She didn't even freak out when she saw the syringe in my room. Okay, before that, I saw the scars on her arm ... I thought she was going to recover, when there will be nothing left of me ... Only that nobody will come to my funeral (Harold shows her to stop) What's the matter, daddy? Is it early to talk about it? Anyway, the most dear person I've ever had will stay in my heart forever. Rest in peace, Becky, away from this crazy family. "

 Lucy pushed Teyna toward Harold, then asked, "What should this mean? You're taking drugs?" Teyna: "Yes,it has already been a year." Harold: "And ... why are you talking about a funeral? Will you kill yourself too?!" Teyna: "There is no need, father. It will kill me slowly." Lucy (frightened): "Who will kill you?" Teyna (lowers her head): "I am HIV positive."

 It was a new shock for her parents. Lucy again had a heart attack and she was transferred to the hospital. She barely survived this time. Joseph also came to the funeral, whom Teyna presented to her parents as her future husband. Of course, they did not like him at all, so the new shock followed when she said that she'll give a birth to his child, and that they would live together in his apartment. Mr. and Mrs. Philward barely endured all these events and informations, and who wouldn't when it have been too much even for the most emotionless person?

 
CHAPTER 4

The next day, Teyna picked up her stuff in one bag and headed downstairs where Harold had a coffee. Without any words, she headed for the exit, but Harold stopped her. Harold: "Where did you go with that bag?" Teyna: "I'm going from you crazy people." Harold: "To that jerk's apartment? Go to your room, I'm still your legal guardian! If you were not pregnant, I would have kicked the hell out of you! " Teyna (going to her room):" Go to hell, you are not able to keep family together! In fact, you destroyed the family last week, you and your Lucy! As if Becky wanted to be a striper or something, so you couldn't accept her choice! I hate you both, you are monsters! " She didn't wait long, but she got out of the window and went to Joseph. Lucy and Harold didn't even notice that she wasn't in the room, they only locked the door and went to their jobs.

Harold was about to make the first move and ask for divorce, since it is already obvious that they have no more reasons to be together.

 Lucy looked at the empty sheet of paper numbly, listening to the voices of the people who worked with her. The boss invited her to his office. Boss: "I want to express my condolences for the death of your daughter." Lucy: "Thank you,it means a lot to me. " Boss: "I have information that you had a heart attack last night. Why did you come to work today? You should have taken a rest." Lucy: "I don't need anything. All that I've done all these years is gone, even that what is still here ... It would be better if I died yesterday when I found out that my other daughter was pregnant with some jerk. " Boss: "I understand your pain, but life continues. Give yourself a time. In the background, you still have your husband with you." Lucy: "Yes ... I guess I have ..."

 When Lucy returned home, she sat on the couch and thought. Her whole life was a mistake starting with her childhood with her parents who were real snobs, with her father who was the best doctor in the city, through falling in love with Harold's friend who had proposed her on the day when she told him that she loves Harold, and then heard news that he had died, and finally when she ruined her own daughters: gave too much freedom to Teyna not to end up like her but, when she saw that didn't work, simply gave up Teyna and shifted her control to Becky.

 She got so lost in her thoughts that she didn't even notice that Harold arrived home. Harold: "Where's Teyna?" Lucy: "I don't know ... in the room? I didn't even see her today." Harold: "Damn, she must have ran away." Lucy: "She'll get back when she realizes how harsh reality is." Harold (giving her a paper): "Here. I want a divorce from you. I wanted to be direct, no hard feelings." Lucy (indifferent): "You couldn't wait to pass a week from Becky's death, and you already bring me divorce papers? " Harold: "You and I have no reason to be together. Let's get this done." Lucy: "Are you hurrying so much to be with your lovely little stupid?" Harold: "Her name is Jonah." Lucy: "Oh, Jonah! Great, now at least I know name of a woman who is about to break my marriage. (sign the paper) Here, I signed a document of your freedom. And don't forget to greet Jonah! I wish you a pleasant life. " Lucy went to the door, and Harold asked, "Where are you going? We did not settle the property ..." Lucy: "It's all yours. I need nothing." She left the house ...

 Teyna watched the television together with Joseph and they talked . Joseph: "I was thinking something ... I think we should take less drugs. We shouldn't lead the baby to danger." Teyna: "Hm ... It sounds hard, but it's worth trying. " Joseph: "We are now left on our own." Teyna: "Yes. But, I know we can do it. We'll deal with the disease as long as we can. I know that Becky would like me to take care, she told me that many times. Wow, I feel like another person when I'm with you ... "

 Lucy, with a little money she had in her pocket, called for a cab and bought a pack of cigarettes. She asked a driver to drive her to the train station. She sat on a bench on the station with a cigarette in her hand, without any luggage. She was thinking whether to jump under the next train that comes or that with the rest of the money buy herself a ticket and find a new life away from here. She decided to try with buying a ticket, after all, the railway won't escape anywhere if she changes her mind. She bought a ticket for the next train that came to the station and went aboard ...

 The new day dawned. The sun was very strong, which is not surprising considering that it is summer. Lucy's office has already been printing a lot of newspapers, and one of the news on the front page "Rail accident, five people were killed, twelve injured."

 Jonah brings coffee and newspapers to Harold. Harold (takes the newspaper): "In these newspapers only some accidents ... (turns page) The train moved from the railway and rolled over, and five lost their lives. (reads names) No. No, no, no, no! Noooooo!" Jonah:" What happened? " Harold (turned pale): ,, No.Lucy Philward. No. No. Jonah, come out, please. " Jonah came out of the office, then heard the breaking of stuff in the Harold's office. She felt that it was smarter to not interfere ... When he calmed down a bit, Harold called Teyna.

 Harold: "Hello, Teyna ..." Teyna: "Will you ask me to come back? Thanks, I'm fine here." Harold: "I want to tell you something, listen to me. Your mother ... died in an accident." Teyna: "... How ... is that ... possible ?!" Harold: "The train moved out of the track. Lucy is one of the five dead, I read that terrible news from the newspapers. Will you come here and go with me for the body?" Teyna: "Yes ... I can't believe that last week I lost sister, and now mother too. " Harold: "I know. I'm waiting for you in front of my company." Teyna: "All right, I'm coming."

 Teyna told everything to Joseph and went to her father alone. Harold was waiting for her and they went to the hospital together. They spoke in the car : "(Teyna) Did this happen because of my departure? What the hell was she looking for in the train?" Harold: "I'm guilty. I shouldn't have been asking her for a divorce the day after the funeral." Teyna (hysterical): "Are you insane? Who the hell ask for a divorce the day after the daughter's funeral? You really need to be treated, psychopath one! "Harold:" It's okay, you don't have to be so cruel, this is hard for me too..." Teyna:" Oh, yes, I see. Murderer. No, wait, DOUBLE MURDERER. "Harold:" Teyna, stop it. " Teyna: "I won't. Will you kill me too?" Harold: "I'm not a murderer!!! (stops the car and goes out) I'm not a murderer, I'm not a murderer ..." Teyna (from the car): "Hey, will you come in already so we can go to where we went? " Harold (numb):" I did not kill them... I did not kill them ... "

 After a while, they arrived at the hospital. They indentificated Lucy's body and took over her personal belongings- unfinished pack of a cigarettes, the small amount of money left from buying a ticket and a letter. Harold and Teyna sat on the bench in front of the hospital, where Harold began to read the letter aloud: "My dear Harold, I'm sorry that our marriage couldn't survive for longer. I'm currently sitting in a train that will take me to my new life, where I will find peace. There is something that I have never told you, because I never had the strength to do it. Do you remember that I insisted on getting married as soon as possible? It's true you cheated on me, but I'm not a saint either. Teyna is the child of your friend. I feel better when I no longer have to hide this secret. Teyna has his adventurous spirit, his gaze, his fearlessness ... I know that you will start a new life with your little stupid, I want to say with the lovely little Jonah, so I didn't want to leave you an obligation of taking care of someone else's child. Tell Teyna that she has my permission to marry because I don't want to be a jerk to her for this little life she has left. Maybe I'll be back one day to see my granddaughter or grandson, but I ended up with you, Harold. Goodbye."

 "So I'm orphan now?"- Teyna asked with tears in her eyes. Harold put his hand on her shoulder and said, "You are orphan, and I'm a fool. I can't believe how she cheated me." Teyna: "And you didn't mention that you cheated her? You are really insane jerk. " Harold: "I'm the jerk? Have you heard what she did to me ?!" Teyna: "Yes, she saved you from the obligations of supporting a pregnant minor. You already have plans with some stupid." Harold: "She is a very nice woman who appreciates and respect me very much." Teyna: "Good, lucky you, now you can make a new family because we weren't ideal." (goes away)

 Another funeral. Co-workers from the editorial office came to give the last greetings to their colleague. Harold stood far from Teyna, who came with Joseph this time. After the funeral Harold returned to his home, while Teyna and Joseph went to their apartment.

 A month later, Teyna moved in to apartment officially and soon after they got married. It was a modest wedding, but quite right in every meaning. Her pregnancy was risky because of the use of drugs all these months, but both Joseph and Teyna managed to drastically reduce the use of narcotic, and at least minimize the risk for the baby's health. Actually, Joseph did it to be a motivation to his wife because he didn't want her to relapse.

While she was in a later pregnancy, Teyna saw Harold on the other side of the street walking around with Jonah, dressed in a expensive suit, with a expensive designer bag in her hands. "Money hunter"- Teyna thought, seeing that Miss obviously wanted to get the money out of her father, or rather to tell her stepfather. At the same time, she was sad for losing her sister, who would now be in the first grade of high school, and then remembered her mother who was left for the money hunter.

 Autumn was passing, so did winter. In February she was supposed to give a birth, which Joseph and she waited impatiently.

 

CHAPTER 5

 At the end of February, Teyna felt that it was time to give birth. Joseph called the cab and quickly took the bag containing Teyna and baby's stuff. The hospital quickly took Teyna to the maternity ward and Joseph waited outside the door. The delivery was long lasting so Joseph prayed that everything was fine with Teyna and with the baby. An hour later the doctor came out and told the news that they were both good, but that there was a big risk that the child was infected with HIV and that delivery was done under extreme precautions so that the staff wouldn't get infected through the blood. The doctor then told Joseph to come into the room if he wants.

He went in and saw Teyna holding a baby in her arms.

 Joseph: "Princess or little boy?" Teyna (smiling ): ,, Princess. Let's arrange the name. " Joseph: "Bella." Teyna: "I like it! How did you come to that?" Joseph: "It doesn't matter. I'm glad you like it." Teyna: "They'll now examine whether Bella is infected ... I pray that she is not ... I want her to live long, not to end like us. " Joseph: "I completely agree with you. After all this, I think you deserved at least her to be fine."

 The next day they got a good news- Bella was not infected with HIV. They were happy because finally something nice happened after all that time. Teyna finished her high school in order to support the child if something happens to Joseph. Joseph worked as a physical worker in one company and earned enough for a life. However, when Bella was two years old the illness got worse and he couldn't work anymore. In order not to pay the hospital he was lying in his apartment, slowly counting his last days. Bella would often ask: "Mom, what is happening to Daddy?", to which Teyna would answer: "Daddy soon goes to a better place. "

 During his last moments she was next to him. Joseph: "Teyna ... The day we both were afraid of is here, but we were aware that it would come. The death will come for me, but you don't give yourself to it as long as you can. Bella needs you. I wouldn't leave neither, but I was already sick when I met you. We have some savings, I hope it will be enough to get started. Be strong. " Teyna:" I will. I will be strong for you and Bella. " Joseph: "Well, I want you to know that the time with you was the best thing that ever happened to me. Don't cry, I will find peace in another world. I will save the place for you, but I hope that you won't quickly join me . Bye... " At that moment, Joseph's life was gone ...

 Teyna remained alone. She found a job and neighbour took care of Bella during the day. During the weekend she would spend time with her daughter and then she would talk to her, sing with her ... Later, they also led conversations on more serious topics, so Teyna would slowly prepare for what was inevitable.

 Bella: "Why do you always wear gloves when I get hurt and you put bandage on my wound?" Teyna: "Mom has one virus and doesn't want you to get it." Bella: "Did Dad had this virus?" Teyna: "Yes, but Dad was ill before me." Bella: "And will you also go like he did?" Teyna: "I won't soon, honey. I hope so." Bella: "Do I have grandma and grandpa?" Teyna (surprised): "Where'd you get that question?" Bella: "A girl was with a grandma and grandpa next to us yesterday. What are grandma and grandpa?" Teyna: "It's mom and dad's parents. You... you don't have a grandma and grandpa."

 She recalled Joseph's story of his childhood: His father harassed his mother in front of his eyes, beat her and threw things at her... she didn't leave the house so that neighbors wouldn't see bruises on her body. When Joseph was ten, one rainy evening, he found her hanged on the attic. Soon he took drugs from older boys... he got HIV infected with syringes, and then it mutated into AIDS. And Teyna somehow started because of company... One friend gave her to try a joint after class, and afterwards she called her on parties, together ran away from classes, gave her to a try a ecstasy and meet other people who also consumed drugs. At that time problems began in family too, the relationship between Lucy and Harold became colder, Becky was bullied and friends were increasingly urging her to continue using drugs.

 Joseph's father died two years ago and she haven't even seen her since she was pregnant. She wasn't sure if she should even call him a father. Again... She remembered how once Harold took Becky and her to the amusement park. He acted like a real dad... it was the most beautiful day spent with him. He mostly acted serious, but he acted like a child that day. She was seven years old and Becky was five, but she knew that she'll remember that day while she's alive. She once wanted to see him again, at least to see if he was still alive ...

 When Bella was five, Teyna was suddenly lost on her weight. The illness slowly progresses, making her starting worrying what to do with Bella because she knew there was not much time to secure her.

 It's a rainy day. Bella was in kindergarten and Teyna goes back from work. After so many years, on the other side of the street, she saw a familiar face. Harold. He still had a beard and short hair, but this time there were grey hairs on them. This time she could not just look at him and do nothing. "Harold, Harold!" She shouted, and he turned to her. "Teyna!" - he said it somehow blue, but still seriously. When she arrived, he was a little shocked.

 Harold: "Teyna, you look very sick. How are you? "Teyna:" Well... I try my best, but I don't know how much I'll be here. I'm worrying for my daughter. " Harold (eyes full of tears): "You have a daughter?" Teyna: "Yes, she's five years old and she's called Bella." Harold: "It's a very nice name." Teyna: "Joseph gave her a name." Harold: "Is he alive?" Teyna: "He died three years ago." Harold: "I'm sorry. How are you living?" Teyna: "I work over the day, at night and on the weekend I'm with her. I'm afraid she'll forget me... (she starts to cry but stops tears and keeps talking) How about Jonah? Does she live with you?" Harold: "She took half of the company after divorce. It's okay that she didn't want and house, I would lose it too. I will never forgive myself for leaving Lucy for that ... that ..." Teyna: "...Money hunter? " Harold: "Yes. Well said. You know, it's horrible to live in that house. When I go to the kitchen, like I see Lucy with a cigarette in her hands and coffee on the table, reading a newspaper. When I go to the bathroom, I see dead Becky laying in the bathtub with slitted wrists. When I go to the living room, as if I see you with that piercing on your eyebrow and hair dyed in several colors... I want to sell a house, our family no longer exists." Teyna:" I think It would be a good idea. Maybe somebody would have more joy in it. We simply couldn't make it. " Harold: "I see that you no longer dye your hair in several colors." Teyna: "No. Joseph and I even quit drug use together, there was no need to spend the last years of our lives under the influence of drugs. I changed because of Bella. " Harold: "I'm unbelievably pleased to hear that." Teyna: "Oh, I completely forgot- I have to go to Bella in the kindergarten. It was a pleasure to talk with you." Harold: "Me too, Teyna. If you need anything, you know where you can find me. I will always be your father."

 It was the last time that she saw him. Next year her health got worse, but she fought with all the forces. Three weeks after Bella's birthday, Teyna died. Bella was only seven when her mother died, but she realized what had happened to her, after all, she told her she'll go to better place where she would meet her dad Joseph. She knew that they take care of her from heaven and would always be with her, although they had to go.

 The Social Service said Bella that she would now live with her closest relative, who very gladly accepted that she would live with him.

 A woman from the Social Service and Bella stood outside in front of the apartment in which Teyna and Bella lived together and waited for the guardian to come. They were on the bench and watched birds flying in the sky. "Is that Mom and Dad? "- Bella asked. Social worker: "No, they are just birds, Mom and Dad are more above them, but they're looking at you. It will be nice for you in the new home, you'll see."

 Guardian came to the bench and said, "Are you Bella?" Bella: "Yes,I am. Are you my guardian?" The social worker confirmed, and then the man said, "And more than that. I'm your grandpa. Harold." Bella: "But Mom said that I don't have a grandpa." Harold: "You have, honey. I'll protect you from everything, you are the only one I have in this world. I will give you everything that I didn't give to my daughters - I have to fix my mistake. Come on, give me your hand." Bella:"And where are we going? " Harold: "In my new apartment. Actually, our new apartment."

 Bella took him by the hand and went with him. They slowly started to walk down the street, while behind them a sound of wind was heard, which would remind someone on the voices of the souls of dead... Four white doves flew above their heads, before they got lost somewhere in the sky ...

The end
17.09.2015.9 evening, Thursday
Suzana Ristić Suza
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Disscusion:
 
 The story "The Breakdown of the System" was written in two days (it seems that I had an inspiration again). Interestingly, on Tuesday, September 15th, I suddenly got the idea for a story in the afternoon. The creation of four main characters went quite smoothly, I first sketched them on paper and then gave them names. I think it's nothing unusual because many characters were the first drawings (eg Princesses from the "Year Seasons I", Lena from the "Serbian Story about Lena and Teodor" , the girls from "Ready For Action?!" ...), and then ... the ideas came just like, and I mostly get into the story completely. The story was written with combined dialogues and action, it was confusing to write in the big notebook (A4 format) for the first time, but somehow I got used to it. I think that's all I could say about writing a story.

The theme of the story is the breakdown of the family in a tragic way.

 In this story I deal with difficult topics again, with the topics I have already worked with, such as eating disorders and suicide (I know that in the "Scale of Sanity" I said that I will no longer kill people in stories, but I can't bear that everything is idyllic- I write this way and I'm dealing with things that are troubling me and people like me, who can't stand sad stories can find a lot more positive authors or read my earlier stories O.O), as well as topics such as the use of narcotics, pregnancy (in this case teen), AIDS ...

 What was the core of the problem of the Philwards? Somebody would say it's Harold's cheating, someone else Lucy's insincerity, and someone else would find another reason... One thing is certain, Teyna and Becky were the most ruined because of it. Becky is the character who is most forced to participate in the situation as a mute observer, without the permission to defend herself. At the moment when she becomes aware of her own weakness she leaves the battlefield, but it turns out that she was the only thing that made the family functioning at least a little. Teyna represents a revolutionary who doesn't accept rules but makes her own plans. Even after diagnosis, she continues her life as if there was no diagnosis, but nevertheless keeping in mind that can't stop what is inevitable. Lucy is someone who has lived in the past in some way; therefore, for every mistake in the present, she has blamed the past. Even repeating the same mistake for her daughter- probably was forced to finish medical school by her parents, only that decision was fatal to her daughter, who already had her life plan. Harold, unlike Lucy, lives in the future. He plans his life in advance and he already had a ready plan for divorce and before the problem started. He speaks about his lover as a nice woman,someone who respects him, and it can be concluded that he planned a wedding with her before Lucy's death.

 Joseph was, at first glance, a carefree young man interested in going out, however, when he realized the seriousness of the situation, we see his caring side. In fact, in the story everything began to break down with the death of the weakest person, the person who saw that she no longer controls her life. Sometimes we are not able to see the seriousness of a situation until the worst happens - so was it in Teyna's and Becky's case , while Harold and Lucy persistently denounced the worst case scenario.

 However, their problems began even before they slowly moved away from each other - as Lucy only wanted security for Teyna, she probably didn't think much about love since the wedding, which is partly due to the tragedy in which Teyna lost the real father, so Lucy felt unprotected when she discovered treachery because Harold represented to her safety more than the love of her life. Such a relationship built on a great secret could not last forever.

 Unlike Becky, Teyna found happiness for at least the last seven years of life. Name Bella is a blend of the names Becky (Be) and Lucy (first letter) with the suffix -la. Joseph never told that to Teyna.

 Bella had to learn very serious things at young age and to accept the death of her parents. Teyna was willing to accept the role of mother, although she knew she would not be able to watch her daughter grow, not knowing how long she would be with her. In real life, the virus HIV is developing for longer, but I think this is a more educational story on this way.

Uh, this is the longest discussion so far, but I wanted to write a detailed analysis of the story. However, in the notebook seemed to be more text.: D

 The story is not inspired by real events in its entirety, but it is inspired by society and the family as the cell of society. Our reality is more morbid even than this story. The expectations that fathers have to secure family, the mothers of which are expected to be successful business women and housewives , children who give in to addiction or suffer from a mental disorder, or even both merged into one. The characters that are mentioned also create the story of our society: the children from Becky's school who represent bullying (in this case verbal which unfortunately I had the opportunity to experience ), Joseph's father as the representative of the abuser in the family, Jonah as a representative of those who come to the money "on the other ways" in order to spend someone else's hard-earned money.

 Well, I think it's time to finish this discussion, I've already had to remind myself once more what I actually do.

I hope you enjoyed the story. Follows: A more positive story, wrapped in a darker fantasy, but still not sad like this and a few before it :)